We Are... What We Are
by Ryuko-chan
Summary: A songfic with Zel's image song "We are". Zel finds a little kitten in the forest. Is it just him, or does she seem to understand what he's talking about?


We are.. what we are  
  
Always so far away...  
  
I'm hurrying along the way to become a fighter  
  
Zelgadis Greywers swore softly to himself, as he woke from a light sleep.  
  
*Always the least opportune times..* he thought as he got up, unsheathing his sword. A creature burst from the bushes. Zel almost laughed. It was a small kitten.  
  
"Oh, just a cat." He murmured. The kitten purred. Its fur was a bluish gray, not unlike the color of the stones that specked his face. In an uncharacteristic action, Zelgadis leaned over and picked up the kitten, who looked him in the face with wide blue eyes. He sat back on the tree he had been sleeping near, and set it down. It curled up in his lap, and looked up at him with expectant eyes. He eyed it carefully.  
  
"What do you want from me?" he asked. The kitten just looked up at him, "Even a dumb animal thinks I look like a freak.." he murmured, just for an excuse to remind himself of that fact. He growled, "Great.. I'm never going to escape those stares." He said aloud.  
  
No way will it stretch to my hand so easily  
  
I remember the people through these same pupils  
  
Then he remembered. For a while, he had.. as he traveled with Lina, Gourry, and Amelia.  
  
*But, they didn't need me around anymore.* he thought. After Lina, with a lot of help from the Lord of Nightmares, had defeated Phibrizzo, they had all traveled together for a time, until Zel, ready to stretch his legs once more, had gone.  
  
"I don't even know, really, why I left. Maybe I just needed to find my own way. Traveling with them was too natural, it just seemed too simple. Maybe I'm just a fool."  
  
Speaking to myself, now, so I keep walking on  
  
Talk to my dreams, and keep walking on...  
  
Zel laughed a little, eyes suddenly on the little kitten. For some reason, it looked as if it was really paying attention. He laughed.  
  
"I feel strange, talking to you, who don't understand a word I say. But, I guess I have to have someone to talk to." Zel looked up at the sky. He sighed.  
  
Where, where now should I keep living?  
  
I don't want to live like a runner forever  
  
Filthy, filthy paths, I don't want to be alone...  
  
Voices bring us together, wounds become strength  
  
I accept tomorrow's challenge  
  
"I really want to see all of them again.. When I was there, it felt like I was someone.. Other than a mutant. I felt like I was part of the group. Even though, with Lina, it was always Zel do this, Zel do that. It was different. People talked to me. I suppose maybe I never really realized how lonely I was before. Of course then I had Zolf and Rodimus, but they were more manservants than friends." The little cat in his lap purred. He rubbed it under its chin. He smiled, looking back up at the stars.  
  
*I can almost hear them.. almost see what they're doing right now.*  
  
"Lina's probably blowing up some bandit hideout, or eating a big meal. Gourry's most likely with her, he's eating.. or asleep at the table." He laughed, "No doubt Amelia's taking care of something or other for her father.." He sighed, "sooner or later I'll probably see them again. No matter how long it is until then. No matter how much it hurts until then." He sighed again. The cat, noticing his mood, jumped up and pressed it's cold nose into a patch of blue flesh. Zel jumped, and looked down at it. He rubbed the fur of its head gently with one finger.  
  
I accept tomorrow's challenge  
  
Tonight, the stars break my sleep...  
  
While I count them, I breathe a sigh...  
  
"Well, whatever happens, at least I know I had some people around me who accepted me for a time." He smiled a bit, staring up at the stars again. The little kitten purred, vibrating his stone skin. He relaxed.  
  
The faraway path is only a detour  
  
How many tears must the underdog shed?  
  
Zel awoke to a scraping sound. He turned swiftly, almost laughing as he saw the little kitten sharpening its claws on the tree. It walked up to him, purring. Zel got up, brushing the dirt off his ivory clothes.  
  
"If you want to stay with me, you'll have to walk on your own," he said to the kitten. It didn't seem to bother him anymore that he was talking to a 'dumb animal.' He walked along the trail for a while, the little kitten following him, as he thought about Lina and the rest to himself.  
  
*Funny, I used to be part of 'the rest' didn't I?* Zel thought. He reached the peak of the hill. He shielded his eyes for a spell, looking along the straight path, which led down an incline to a city. Then he recognized the city.  
  
"Atlas city.. strange how it would be the city so near to us when Lina fought. Hm, that was so long ago though.. More than a year, in fact, almost two years." The little kitten emerged from the bushes, rubbing on his leg. He picked it up absentmindedly. He walked along the path, which then plunged back into the perpetual shade of forest. He settled down next to a tree for a rest. A loud, leaf crunching sound alerted him to a person in the nearby bushes. His trained, sharp hearing told him that it was a woman, and that she was quite sure-footed. She burst onto the path, smiling as she saw it. She didn't even notice him. Then the kitten mewed. She flicked her eyes over to Zel, then looked again. Her eyes were wide, and a little frightened. Hurriedly, Zel pulled up his mask. She turned, curious.  
  
"Are you.." she started, but thought better of it when she saw his sword, "Did you know that you found my cat?" she asked. Zel gave her a glance.  
  
"This little cat is yours?" he asked. She nodded. The small kitten ran over to her. She smiled, and picked it up. She sat down next to Zel.  
  
"You were talking to her.. I heard." She said, smiling. Zel blushed.  
  
"Oh, that.. I, uh, well." He said. She laughed.  
  
"Don't mind, she's very easy to talk to. She likes you, you know." The woman said cryptically. The kitten jumped into his lap. The woman got up.  
  
"Come now, you." She said to the kitten. The kitten purred, "What?" the woman asked, "What do you mean? You don't want to go?" The kitten purred louder, "You do? Oh, all right, but I'm leaving." She left, mumbling under her breath. The little kitten jumped off Zel's lap. Zel got up, staring strangely at where the woman had left.  
  
I can see the dream, but what does "today" mean?  
  
You should understand, again, that it encourages me!  
  
*Wonder what that was all about..* Zel thought. He was just about to leave, hoping, just a little, that the kitten would follow. He turned to see it, but.. it hadn't moved. It looked at him with its wide, dark blue eyes, and meowed. Then tendrils of mist rose from it, and it was fogged out. Zel stepped back, gripping his sword.  
  
"Do not be afraid." said a soft voice. Zel stared, confused. The mist cleared away, leaving a small girl, with long bluish-gray hair. She was wearing a striped dress, and smiling.  
  
"Who are you?" he asked.  
  
"I am the spirit of this forest. A cat spirit.." she said, grinning with sharp teeth, "You are a very interesting person, chimera. I wish you well, and, whatever a blessing from a cat goddess means to you, I give it to you." She purred. Zel felt a kiss on his forehead. He stared, amazed at the girl.  
  
"You were that small kitten, weren't you?" he asked. She nodded, smiling.  
  
"Find your hope, Zelgadis Greywers. And find your path." She said, smiling, as she faded away. Zel frowned.  
  
"That was strange." Zel said. He smiled faintly.  
  
*Now that there's no one to talk to, I should stop talking..* he thought with a smile. Then he started walking again.  
  
Where, where now should I keep living?  
  
This straight path is so boring...  
  
Dusty, dusty paths, I'll cut my own  
  
Inside my thoughts, wounds become strength  
  
I walk on, tomorrow...  
  
The sun was setting as Zelgadis Greywers stepped into the town.  
  
*You know.. It's really not so bad, being in this town. Even with all these people. looking at me.* Zel, of course, was cloaked. But, even cloaked, his appearance drew eyes. Not many people went cloaked in a large city. Of course, it drew less stares than he would if he weren't wearing it. He smiled, though no one else could see it.  
  
*Maybe I am doing OK, after all. I bet you I'll meet up with those guys again before long.* He looked over to the wall, where the remnants of a wanted poster were tacked. He smiled. The sun went down, plunging the town into relative darkness. But, there was something.  
  
*What's that?* Zel asked himself, as he saw the shaft of light. Two sorcerers were talking excitedly.  
  
"Did you hear? Did you?" one said to the other.  
  
"What?" the other said.  
  
"That shaft of light.. it's a sign.. It means that the shield is gone, and that we can go to the outer world. It happened just a little while ago." One, dressed in the robes of a Black magic user said.  
  
"Really?" the other, dressed in robes of white, said.  
  
"Yeah. Prince Philionel of Seyruun is sending a bunch of ships from his port." The black sorcerer said. Zel grinned. He walked off into the night.  
  
*Sounds like this is just the kind of thing Lina and Gourry would show up for. And if I can get on one of those ships, I can search for a cure, perhaps the only place I haven't looked* he smiled secretively. He made his way to the outskirts of the city, smiling under his cloak.  
  
*I have a great feeling that something important is going to happen there, if only I take charge, and show up.* and so, as he reached the outskirts of town, he sent a grin back, and ran down the hill at full demon speed, leaving it in the dust.  
  
*We are slowly coming together.* Zel thought as he ran, *And I won't miss it for the world!* 


End file.
